


Red Like, Well, Your Armour

by sniperscythes



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-25
Updated: 2015-05-25
Packaged: 2018-04-01 04:02:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4005139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sniperscythes/pseuds/sniperscythes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>tumblr prompt: 'simmons and grif are making a go of a relationship, but simmons is embarrassed to admit that all those jokes grif's made over the years about simmons being a virgin are RIGHT. he'd relieved when grif tells him that he is, too, but that two people as smart as simmons and hot as grif should be able to figure something out.'</p>
            </blockquote>





	Red Like, Well, Your Armour

Pestering Simmons was one of Grif’s favourite hobbies. It was hardly difficult to make his boyfriend flustered (even so early on in their relationship), and even less so to piss him off entirely.

“Siiiiiiiimmons. Simmons. Dick Simmons.” The red-armoured man was attempting to ignore the calls, instead focusing on cleaning his rifle. “Dick. Dickie. Dickie Bitch. Dickmons.” Simmons huffed, face growing red in annoyance.

“What do you want, Grif?” he said, finally turning to glare at the Hawaiian man. Grif laughed, revelling in Simmons’ irritation.

“Aw, Simmons, you’ve gone all red. Every part of you matches now!” Simmons scowled, returning to cleaning the rifle barrel. With Grif as a distraction, it had taken him over an hour to even do the basics, and it was really pissing him off. Grif leaned back on his bed, smirking over at him.

“Hey, Simmons. Dont’cha have any other things you can do? Cleaning stuff is so boring.” Simmons merely sighed. Grif laughed. “Oh, wait, of course you don’t! Fucking nerd virgin, I forgot.” Simmons threw down his rifle, having had enough. He spun to face the tan man, eyes boring holes into him.

“Grif, stop.” Grif cackled, shuffling onto the bed. He leaned his head against Simmons’ shoulder.

“Duuuuuude, bet you’d love to get a bit of this ass.” He whistled, poking Simmons’ cheek, “Hey, baby, wanna come home with me?” 

“We are literally dating, Grif.”

“You still want me, nerd virgin.”

“That’s not the point!” Grif froze, a broad grin stretching across his face. Simmons’ mouthed clamped shut as he realised what he’d said.

“Oh my god. You actually are a virgin!” Grif wheezed out through his laughter. Simmons shoved his shoulder.

“Fuck you, man, like you’re not.” He was not letting Grif win that easily.

“Hell no, dude, I get all the chicks.”

“Grif, you’re gay. You get none of the chicks.”

“I get more chicks than Tucker, I’ll have you know.”

“The only chicks Tucker can get are Tex and your sister. Do you want to rethink that statement?” Grif shivered at the thought.

“Ok, fair point.” Simmons rolled his eyes. 

“Whatever. Yeah, I’m a virgin, and a certain Hawaiian girl told me that her brother is too.” Grif looked shocked.

“You can’t be trusting Sister over me! Where is the mutual respect of this relationship?”

“Admit you’re a virgin then, if you’re gonna go on about ‘mutual respect’.” Simmons smirked down at the tan man. 

“Ugh. Fine. I’m a virgin, happy?” Grif grumbled, avoiding eye contact. Simmons smiled.

“Very. Kinda shocked though, figured someone with your looks would have no trouble getting some.” Simmons commented.

Grif snorted. “Says you. Aren’t chicks supposed to find that intelligence shit sexy?” 

“Explains a lot about you.”

“Hey!” The pair grinned at each other. After a moment, Simmons spoke.

“Y’know, with your flawless looks and my great intelligence, I bet we can figure something out, eh?” He winked. Grif groaned

“Simmons, that was the least smooth thing ever. Of all time. I am ashamed to be your boyfriend in this very moment.”

“I’m not wrong though, am I?”

“Well, my look are flawless, it’s true.”

“Oh, shut up. You know what I mean.” Simmons grumbled. Grif chuckled, before leaning up to press his lips to the red heads.

**Author's Note:**

> will i ever be prompted for something other than grimmons? the world may never know. prompt me at sniperscythes.tumblr.com


End file.
